My Don't-Related Triathlon Goals

Time Spent on book: 2 hours
Words written: Collecting
Grade for the day: C (Started the week well. Not so much by the end)

I'm doing a triathlon this weekend, and I have been thinking about my goals for this race. 

I have learned through running that it's good to have goals. Sometimes my goal is a time or a distance. Lately, it's been more related to staying injury-free. But goals keep me focused on something, which I find helps me get out the door.  

With this triathlon, though, I think that my goals can't focus too much on the event itself. After all, my "training" for the non-running events has consisted of three bike rides and one swim. 

So with that, I offer up the following set of goals for my forthcoming triathlon. They are all, as you will note, "don't"-related. Why? Because often when I "do" something, bad things happen.

  1. Don't Separate a Shoulder. Yep, I did that. The first time I "trained" for a tri, I went to the pool and "swam" some laps. After I was finished, I went to put my shirt on and POP GOES THE SHOULDER JOINT! Next thing I knew I was in an ambulance jacked up on morphine, having a conversation with the EMT about John Wesley (I guess my heart was strangely warmed?). It should be noted that I had separated my shoulder a few times before this. And I did have surgery since then to put everything back into place. But still, I don't want to revisit that ambulance.
  2. Don't Break Any Bones. Again, this has happened. When I lived in Florida, I ran a 5k trail race. About two miles in, I stepped awkwardly on a root and POP GOES THE FIFTH METATARSAL! I actually managed to finish the race. We had a saying in the Marines that there is a fine line between being hardcore and being stupid. Finishing the 5k on that day? Yep, stupid. Clearly.
  3. Don't DNF (Did Not Finish). I did that in a marathon two years ago and it was demoralizing enough that I had to write about it. Finishing tomorrow will be good for my ego. Aside from the accomplishment itself, once I cross that finish line, I will have a brand new personal record (PR). This is my third triathlon ever, but first at this distance. At my age, my PRs in running are a distant and faded memory. So finish the race, and bask in the glory.   
  4. Don't Let Anyone Take Pictures Of Me In My Biker Shorts. Enough said.


  1. You've got this! I did a tri many years ago and yours is sure to be much more successful. During mine, the water was unexpectedly cold and triggered an asthma attack. The guy directly behind me said "while you are deciding whether or not you are going to drown, flip over and go backstroke." Well, not quite my race plan, but ok. My bike broke during the cycling portion. Did you know you can't ditch your bike and run? Your bike has to make it through the transition area so I pushed my bike up hills and coasted down hills. I came through that transition area 20 minutes behind the next to last athlete. The race director kept shouting "You're in last. She's in last." Yes, honey. EVERYONE knows without you shouting. (Cheering spectators say the same things regardless of whether you are first or last but their attitudes are much different. If there was such a thing as sarcastic clapping...) My husband asked if I wanted to sneak away and not finish. Heck no. I finished dead last (but only about 1 minute after the next to last runner). Best of luck.

  2. That's a great (and terrifying) tri story! I'll try to avoid that. I'm not sure that I would push my bike through the course, though. I'd probably take the DNF. Happy trails!!!

  3. Really funny story above! From a former triathlete, Art, how did it go?

  4. Finished with 3 out of the 4 goals! Dang bike shorts picture... But everything is intact and I had a great time. My brothers did it too, and we hit up a terrific brewery the night before--The Elk Creek Cafe. Fun stuff!


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